Monday, September 05, 2005

[I wrote a longer entry but it came back with a system error. Oh what the heck...]

Although encouraging, it is also a rather disturbing idea... Now that Tanaka-sensei has spoken during the round-the-table-comments-to-everyone session at the farewell dinner last Sat.

I should fight with a relaxed body and a strong spirit - not tensing up and displaying my thinking-too-much mentality on my face during keiko.

My state of mind should be like a big but calm, quiet lake without ripples.

I have got the timings, opportunities, speed and stamina right, which much qualifies me as a national team member in international championships. What I need to work on, is how I should approach each fight. The Kimochi, so to speak.

... Slowly and steadily I am being pressured to train for the world championships. It's more than a year away and I am not sure why everyone is so serious about it already. It takes away a lot of the fun and enjoyment I can have, sucking up a huge chunk of my energy and time (while not having a decent income) ... Maybe I just can't handle that kind of pressure and responsiblity. I wish I can just play and enjoy.

My wrist is 99.9% recovered, but I am not sure about the squad training tomorrow. I get quite scared about going 250+ hayasuburi this month, being out of practice for so long...

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